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Tuesday, September 20, 2011

A Study in TrogloPology, Evolution, Etymology, and Lots of Spin

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As the younger generation grows up and experiences new things, they often are confronted by uncomfortable and confusing truths from which the older has been trying to shield them. Now is one of such times.


The young TrogloPundit has just discovered one of those inconvenient truths of which I hid from him for many years- a troglodyte is one of a family of cute little songbirds. The macho caveman has been reduced to a fluffy bug-eating ball of feathers. How could he possibly regain any self-esteem before becoming Purina Cat Chow?


Interestingly enough, the modern word 'spin,' that means to paint a rosy picture in the midst of sewage, is derived from early human troglodytic language. Spin comes from the Troglodytic word '#@!&*#.' One day Trog was sitting around a small pile of sticks, dry leaves, and grass. Mrs. Trog began nagging him for the umpteenth time about the saber-toothed tiger that was terrorizing the troglohood. Trog picked up a small stick, began spinning it between his palms, and quietly uttered #@!&#. The stick's friction started the dry tinder on fire, Mrs. Trog stopped her nagging, and, thus, the modern meaning of 'spin' began.


And the spin continues. After a long, involved study of the evolution of modern troglodytes, the TrogloPologists in our secret basement laboratory have discovered many interesting facts concerning our present day cute little warbler.


A member of the modern Troglodyte family:


A member of the Troglodyte family 352,639,012 years ago:


A member of the family 683,093,109 years ago attacking his favorite food, the Tyrantosaurus PseudoRex:
Now that's a pretty macho grandpappy and will return some pride to the Trog's backbone!


Human TrogloPundit evolution had a similar, but much more rapid advance.


The TrogloPundit family circa last Tuesday:


The TrogloPundit family after a trip to the local Super Walmart:


It's settled science.


Often times rigorous scientific research accidentally discovers other truths, as the preceding study clearly does. It shows the clear evolutionary blogging kinship between The TrogloPundit and Mr. Pterodactyl.

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